"Am I indecisive?" Can I get back to you on that?

Blasts in Varanasi and Bastard Advani to launch another yatra...wow !!

2006-03-08T15:54:00.000+05:30

First the headlines....

At least 20 people were killed when two powerful bombs rocked the Sankat Mochan Temple and the cantonment railway station in Varanasi on Tuesday evening
Minutes after the first blast, another blast took place at a waiting room at the Varanasi cantonment railway station.
Soon after the blasts, three live bombs were recovered from the temple complex and one was recovered from a nearby restaurant.
Live bombs were also recovered from Godolia and Dashaswamedh ghat.
Donning the Hindutva cap once again after the Jinnah interlude, Leader of Opposition Lal Kishenchand Advani on Wednesday announced plans for undertaking yet another yatra in the wake of the blasts in Varanasi.
Making a scathing attack on the terrorist infrastructure in Pakistan and the "minorityism" being pursued by the Congress-led government, Advani said he and Bharatiya Janata Party chief Rajnath Singh will embark on twin 'national integration yatras'.

(NDTV Correspondent Wednesday, March 8, 2006 (New Delhi/Varanasi).

Is the Police and Intelligence Agencies..blind..deaf and dumb...?? No, they are FUCKING IGNORANT they hardly care abt others...they have their pockets full...thats it..

Some son of a bitch bombs up a place and u bastards hold another yatra..Haven't u realised what did u all do the last time..Advani-ass hole stop ur fucking game... everyone knows...but i don't understand still ppl keep supporting that bastard Advani..what the fuck is Hindutva...killing ppl..is it? Rajnath singh yesterday after the blasts gave a statement that this is all done by SAMAJVADI party...fuck u man...u r the biggest chut on earth who is trying to take the edge when elections are at the corner...don't u fcuking want to catch hold of that bastard who blew up the place...nahi..inko to apni "gaand" bachani hai...

After seeing Anand Patwardhan's movie--In the Name of God..i had mixed feelings about the whole Babri Masjid issue..but then..what the FUCK is going on...saale kutte politicians ki mili bhagat...madarchod khud hi ye blasts karvate hain...aur apne BULLET proof and shit proof cars mein baithe rehte hain..

It's very sad to realize that we YOUNGSTERS are fucking doing nothing..everyone thinks what can we do?? Chutiyon...tum nahi karoge to kaun tera BAAP karega...ye madarchod leaders aaise hi chusste rahenge aur hum saale US ke sapne dekhte hue zindagi bita denge...

Sab ko "Bangalore" mein naukri chahiye...jahan subah se kaam karenge...phir kisi "PUB" mein jaa ke daaru piyenge aur masti waali life jiyenge...Chutiyon when will u realize that THAT very FUCKING bomb could have be under your ass....There is no mother-fucker who is even ready to fight for his basic rights here in the college...tum kya ladoge...

All fucking politicians who just wants to secure their future over ppl's life should be stripped and chopped to death...

If u feel that I'm some kind of a psycho...then i'm sry to say u r an ass-hole for not realising the reality.....

--AciD BurN

Paraskevidekatriaphobia: Fear of Friday the 13th

2006-01-29T01:32:00.000+05:30

Paraskevidekatriaphobia....
Can someone spell it for me...Because i really can't.
Though no one can say for sure when and why human beings first associated the number 13 with misfortune, the belief is assumed to be quite old and there exist any number of theories to trace its origins.
Now u r thinking why another post on this stupid phobia issue..but let me tell u this day actually proved very LUCKY to me....
Surprised, ya...i got my Job on that day...This post which i'm writting after 5 months..just tells u how frustated i was after getting 6 rejections. Felt torn apart..family, friends etc...all worried abt me and my future and also after getting Sucked up Big time in CAT and other exams, you can say that i was just broken. Then on Jan-13th 2006 the Friday i check my mail at 2:20pm and i see that the company-FUTURES FIRST (known as G H Financials-London) is visiting the campus at 2:30 for recruitment...
Neways i reached in my casuals to the Administrative block and then the placement officer yells at me. So, i change in 10 min and rush to the block again.
To my surprise there were 2 firangis, with a stupid smile. Neways the test goes on with a starter-3 min...quick maths test with stupid decimal calculations upto 3 digits. I mean around 20 questions like 1.987/6.098 i mean how am i supposed to calculate it within 3 min...20 questions...neways then came the GK round...and then Logical Reasoning....

Thats when i realised, wow 4 years of fucking engineering is of no use...to get a job u need this crap...i mean all companies TCS,Infosys, fucking Reliance, HP, blah blah..everyone has this as their Entrance criteria....
Neways we were 4 who were selected for the GD rounds...GD--Group Disscussions...Questions were like...
1. Do you want to be a Arrogant or a Passive Trader...?
2. What do you think Competitiveness does to an individual...?
3. What are your weaknesses that won't let you get this job...?
4. Why do you think you are suitable for the job...?

Most importantly we had to speak FOR and AGAINST the first two questions. The last two were strictly for 2 min..We had to speak nething but not less than 2 min...mandatory to speak for two min...Neways after this they called me in...i was just shivering and thinking FUCK again fucked 7th rejection...but then there was a PI-Personal Interview....I really don'tknow what i spoke..

I couldn't understand the English of that firangi...i guess he asked me to Tell abt myself...so i just went on....they finally selected me and they didn't even interview the other three...Well though i was very happy still i was just dissapointed by their way of selection, i mean not interviewing the other 3 in which i had one of my very good friends--SAGAR...

Well i just hope he gets into a very nice company soon....But for now i'm happy with my 2.4 + salary to start in JUNE in Hyderabad...though my dad feels that working in a financial firm after doing my B.Tech dosen't justify my Engineering but WHO CARES..??? I got a Job on 13th the Friday which i'll never forget in my life...

After 4 months.......

2005-08-06T13:31:00.000+05:30

Now after 4months, this is my new post.
I donno how many of u read my blog....Neways i don't write this for people to read and enjoy or something....
So, here i present to u the guy who is still UNEMPLOYED......U might have seen in the Bollywood movies where the hero wanders in the city for a job and sees those stamps of UNEMPLOYMENT, NO VACANCIES and REJECTED popping up everywhere...
....Well i've been dreaming for quite sometime now abt that guy and then i figure out that.....
...Oh SHIT that's me....

Well truly speaking i'm out of it...FUCK U COLLEGE...for having ruined my life.....
Itna chutiyaapa zindagi mein nahi hua......neways just waiting for an oppertunity to kick the asses of Legendary Prabhat Ranjan and son of a bitch Banerjee.......

We had a meeting yest. of all the "scum of the college"---as Chetan Parikh's words....there he asked usjust a simple Question --"Why did u all FAIL ?"........
Now just tell me who is that son of a bitch who wants to FAIL in his life EVER....i mean fuck u man....he thinks we FAIL because we want to fail.......and he started asking us WHY WE DIDN'T APPEAR FOR SMALLER COMPANY'S recruitment exams?
I mean take this _l_ i don't like the company or the package..why blame me or us.....

Then comes Banerjee.....last but not the least to pour more Oil in the burning fire......
He asked us not to think of any big companies now also not to expect a package of even 2 lacks.
He said we have a good chance of coming up in a smaller company......
I mean he gave a choice---"Do u want to be a small fish in an ocean?"
What does that mean......well he forgot to see the other side of the coin..........
I don't want to be a "BIG SHARK in a fish tank".......

Well i have only one thing to say now.....it's in HINDI though.....
"Sher bhooka mar jaayega lekin Ghaas nahi Khayega"
"Main ye nahi kehta main Sher hoon, main ye kehta hoon ki vo Ghaas hai"

that means --"A lion will die hungry but won't eat the grass"
"I'm not saying that i'm the lion, i'm saying the company is grass"

Well i think i shd take a break..else the whole Rajeev inside me will just come out...

So it Ends.....

2005-04-11T08:04:00.000+05:30

Finally today 11thOf April @ 8:09am the SEN documents are almost over....

I'm so releaved, this semester i've been going through a lot of unexpected things...
Someone comes and threatens me of ruining my life, some are doing somethings which they know is gonna hurt me...and some are just taking advantage of my "being soft" nature...
But then i've learned and have been learning how to deal with people like them. They know it !!!

Neways so now What ???
1 more presentation and 1 project in the next fortnight to be completed before the FINALS...
I mean i never ever used to think of the exams until they came on my head (i mean thats the way it used to happen before me joining the college) but then today at the galla with mini it was only academics, sutta and typical galla chai.

Also the frusatation of the past week where i've been sleeping @ 9:00am, 8:00am or not at all before 1:00pm comes to an end....

Thank You Bakarjee for ur Bakars and a very INTERESTING Course...
--- aCid bUrn...

Finally.......

2005-04-07T04:12:00.000+05:30

So, finally today i told everything to that person concerned abt all the
things that were supposed to be disclosed.
I feel a bit relaxed now...After a lot of effort today i cudn't resist it
and spoke.
Well i never understood why things like PM flags off the bus or any news
of such utter shit importance flashes as the Headlines of most of the
newspapers (TOI in particular) i mean a couple of months back when i was
going through the paper i saw that Britney Spears has named her dog
LUCKY...i mean "Hey Bhagwan" ...how is that a headline...
And then today when i sat down after a bad day on my comp...i see these
kinds of stupid news flashing everywhere..

And also..now at the corner i see the ELECTIONS coming up(our college's
internal)...ppl making startegies late in the night..as to how they get
into the diff. commitees....as i'm writing these ppl are discussing in my
room as to how they shd go abt targeting the public...
I mean u hear all these things....

   * aap to hamare bhai ho
   * aap ko to bolne ki zaroorat nahi hai
   * yaar election ke baad party pakki
   * yaar tum to samajhte ho na
   * hum mein se koi raha to achha hoga

Even i'm contesting for the elections but i know these words are not gonna
make any diff.
Ppl if they want they'll vote for u......but neways my room is a free for
all discussion place so....
can't help it..much.....I always get reminded of the song from GARDEN
STATE....."Everyone saying diff. things to me"... a perfect situational
song......And now the stupid net stopped working...4:12am 7th of April
2005.

Crap ...Crap...Crap again....

2005-04-06T02:04:00.000+05:30

Well nothing special about today...but bus i just got frustated with some news which i know is gonna haunt in my sleep as well for a lot number of days...
Well i donno why i always take every little thing close to my heart..may be AAISA HI HOON MAIN kinds but i seriously don't think that anyone's gonna know why i behave weird most of the times...even i'm clueless.
Today my frustation was the most of all times in this SEM but then i really can't go and kick someone's ass and take out my frustation. But then an ANONYMOUS person with whome i had a long chat today night just made me feel as to what am i getting into....I really THANK that human being for taking HIS important time just to talk to me...
And then when i came back to the room, i was just thinking as to whatever he said...
man those words really came out of a really good soul mind u....

But then as usual the stupid brainstorming session where my mind gets divided into i donno how many pieces began and the only one that came to my rescue was MUSIC....
I just can't live without Kishore da or Mohammad Rafi they are like Angels ...well now after an hour of continuous music i've regained my senses back and feel OK...

I just posted this coz i heartfully wanted to thank that INDIVIDUAL ANONYMOUS for his inspiring words today which might change my life further in due course of time...
Dude u know who u r..

What the Hell is happening to ME...

2005-04-04T03:50:00.000+05:30

Well it's 3:00 am now on 4th April 2005 and i'm unable to sleep.....
But it's not only today ..it's been happening from 4 months now....
Just don't know what has happened......i got up today at 4:00pm in the evening and was lying in the bed till 7:00pm blankly looking at the roof.......TOTALLY BLANK.................
This is getting tough for me......
Back home when i went during the HOLI break my mom got freaked out when she saw me restless and not sleeping in the night....She forced me to go see a doc.. I got check-ups done for aroung 800 fucking bucks just to c that everything was normal. Stupid Appolo Doc also says that i better go c a psychiatrist. But i'm unable to understand WHY IS THIS FUCKING THING happening to me ?? I'm mentally sound......
Also now i'm in such a bad/weird mood that if someone comes and offers me a fag, i will go for it.
I've been trying to reduce the frequency of the no. of fags from some months now, worked out vwey well initially but now i'm totally blank ....i can't decide what to do as well even though i have to projects to be submitted and a presentation which are all due sometime around 13th of APRIL but here i am writing the blog....
This is my first post and i donno what to write more - i know most of the times i write SHIT but this is pretty serious stuff that i've written...